Bulma Briefs: Ace Detective
by Ninja Jiyu
Summary: Bulma Briefs doesn't cope well with boredom. One-shot. Rated T for slight language and Vegetables in nothing but towels. Warning!: This story contains more than your recommended daily dosage of Crack!


This is what happens when you, _yet again_, give a Bleach-obsessed author the chance to write a fic on any subject she wants to keep her sanity while writing stories.

Pure. Unadulterated. _Crack._

**Disclaimer:** I don't own DBZ or any of its characters. That is the joy of Akira Toriyama.

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Bulma had a suspicion on her mind. And not just _any_ suspicion either. Oh no. This was a suspicion to top _all_ other suspicions.

And it all started yesterday…

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Bulma was bored again. Her children were off at school and all of the house work was being taken care of by robots.

This being said, _no_, she was _not_ lazy!

…She just had other aspect of life to attend to…

…Like being bored.

Utterly and totally _bored_.

So, she did what she always did when she was bored like this.

She watched Vegeta train.

And so, while watching her husband train, she began to wonder just _how_ in the world he had obtained such _gigantic_ muscles. Really. They were unnatural!

I know. Random right?

But that was beside the point.

Now, boredom was something that Bulma had learned that she didn't cope well with. So, out of said boredom, she decided to pursue her sudden suspicion and investigate, despite the fact that she could possibly be horribly wrong about her thoughts and sudden accusations.

But, eh. Why the hell not?

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And so it became that Bulma was sitting in her kitchen pretending to read the newspaper and drink coffee.

"Hello, Vegeta." she said as her husband walked in and grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator, "How was your training?"

"Fine." he replied gruffly, taking a long swig of the water and letting out a satisfied 'ah' as he finished.

"I'm going to take a shower." he stated, "I expect my dinner after I'm finished, woman."

"Okay, Vegeta." she said, not even looking up at him from her paper. He grunted and left.

Time for her plan to begin.

After making sure that her husband was in the shower (indicated by the squeak of the faucet) she threw down her paper and ran up to their shared bedroom as fast as she could. Panting as she reached the door, she nodded in determination and threw it open, closing it behind her with and audible 'click'.

Making her way over to her husband's side of the bed, she proceeded to sift through his night stand. She knew she was at least _partly_ correct in her theory because she had _seen_ needles in the trash before.

Digging through his stuff, she gave a cry of joy when she found what she was looking for. Holding it up in triumph, she grinned.

In her hand she held a small syringe filled with a clear liquid. She had him now! This was it! Undeniable proof that-

"Woman, what are you doing with my vitamin shot?"

Bulma whipped around toward the voice. In the doorway, nothing but a towel around his waist, was her husband. He was giving her a funny look.

When did-?

How did-?

Why didn't she _hear_ him get out of the shower!? Why did-

Wait. Did he just say-

"V-vitamin shot?" she questioned, looking at the needle she held in her hands.

"Yes," he said slowly, "a _vitamin shot_. Have you heard of them?"

She wasn't paying attention. "Y-you mean this isn't……uh…" she trailed off.

"Isn't what, woman?" he demanded, walking over to their closet and retrieving some cloths.

"S-_steroids_?"

Vegeta turned around and looked at her. _Really_ looked at her.

She was serious.

He had to laugh.

"_Steroids_!?" he laughed, shaking his head, "Honestly, woman! What has gotten into your head!? Steroids! Pah! As if I would ever need to use any of _those_ pathetic human enhancers! I'm a saiyajin!" he laughed and started dressing.

"Heh, yeah…" Bulma said, placing the needle back on his night stand, more than a bit embarrassed, "saiyajin….right." she coughed. "I'm, ah, just gonna go and fix dinner now…"

She ran.

"I want steak!" he yelled after her, "And don't hold back on the sauce, woman!"

"Right! Steak!" she yelled back.

Vegeta shook his head. "Steroids. Really! Has she gone crazy on me?"

**. . . . .**

Now in the kitchen, Bulma did her best to compose herself as she started to cook.

"Vitamin shots," she muttered, "Oops."

Needless to say, that was the last time _she_ ever went investigating based on suspicion alone.

…Until Trunks got a girlfriend, that is.

But that's a _whole_ other story entirely.

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Urg. I really gotta stop writing all this crack…..It's killing my brain cells!

Make sure to review! Please and thank you!


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